To Steph Rowe, Ted Nims, Bisa Myles, Stephen Rothwell, and Adam Hickman..
This is a request from you to STOP supporting his Counting Countries podcast as his patron.
Because he has done a great injustice and has acted unethically. He basically slandered me and did not post any apologies for it.
Those who are interested may go into the details at My EPS Adventure but in short, I had a bad experience in EPS, I couldn't stand the level of intelligence, the arrogance, the hatred and wanted out.
After some time, Ric asked me to be on his podcast and I accepted. We did the podcast in August 2018. I had just returned from a trip and was still tired. I have been on TV and radio programs before but I was excited to be doing an interview for the first time in English. I wasn't too satisfied with it, the way I talked, you know... you criticize yourself. However, I was glad I got to talk about some of the issues I deem to be very important and do not get talked about.
Anyway... When it came out in October, I was in for a big surprise, a very bad one!
"Gülin was eventually kicked out of the group for violating a number of rules that members must follow." Yeah... So easy to smear and not care!
I asked him:
"What were the group rules that I have violated? If you accuse someone of something, you need to explain them what they have done wrong."
"My recollection is your situation was discussed amongst the moderators and you were voted out for numerous violations," Ric answered.
Oh yeah??!! I was voted out for numerous violations, he announces I am kicked out for several violations, but when I ask, he cannot even mention one thing I did wrong!
Sorry but it is outrageous!
No, I take back the sorry, it is totally outrageous!
All he can come up with is "Oh, there were many complaints about you."
Oh great! I am so happy and relieved to learn that!
I'll give it to Ric that I did not walk out on my own, but he didn't know anything about what had happened to be able to say/broadcast that I was kicked out. This is something that is totally against ethics.
There were also so many other issues with the podcast. I mean not with the podcast itself but how Ric portrayed me. I go into that at A Podcast Gone Wrong
Again to Ric's credit, he changed the introduction after I protested.
However, the podcast was still the same of course. And this being a podcast, people generally do not read the introduction on the website but listen to the podcast.
So I said "I'm hoping you are going to be updating that too."
He said it would take some time. But I didn't want people to be listening to the podcast like that. Not one person more had to hear that. So I asked him to take the podcast down.
That is, not right away.
On the contrary, he published it on another portal saying it was controversial and had gotten a threat to be sued. This upset me even more. Because obviously, he was using me, trying to get clicks.
I was also upset about Maurizio Giuliano who had acted horribly in the group and not had any repercussions.
Ric asked me "Who cares about Maurizio, why do you keep writing paragraph upon paragraph on him?"
"I care about that idiot Maurizio because he is still considered a “respectable” member of the society while I am ostracized! And you, too, should care!" I wrote to Ric. "Do you have any idea, I mean can you imagine how frustrating it is to be told I have been kicked out of a group for SEVERAL violations, and this being told not in person but ANNOUNCED PUBLICLY, and when I ask what rules I have violated, you are not able to name even ONE single violation. No example no nothing! “Ah I remember you've been reported several times.” What have I been reported for? By whom?
The damage is done Ric. The damage is done. You posted that thing out there, now everybody (well, whoever that everybody is... I don't know how many people are in your mail-list and how many people actually listen or care, but still... obviously it is high enough that companies pay you or sponsor you thinking some people will care) thinks I am a person who violates rules, who is some sort of, I don't know, a “wrong” person. After all, I was KICKED OUT, right? I want a public apology Ric, I want a public apology from you, in the mail-list and on FB and Twitter as well, I want it cleared. For anybody who could care. I want my name cleared. As I said, I do not care the least bit for whatever people think of me, everybody is entitled to their opinion, but ONLY as long as it is based on accurate facts; I do not like smears. And sorry to say, that is a slur. You know, even if you make a correction after a mistake, you cannot undo it. The stain remains; people remember the first thing they read. They have already registered things. And I don't like it.
I will also ask you to reinstate me to the group. Make Maurizio apologize for his wrong claims (RyanAir) and for his wrong accusations (that I was seeking your pity), or he is removed from the group. I would also like Stefan to publicly scold him for talking about pregnant girls, something that is completely irrelevant to the group topic.
I don't know... I really shouldn't have had to say all these things in the first place. I keep wasting my time trying to right wrongs that shouldn't have happened, that shouldn't be happening in the first place. Or that should have been prevented by people running a community, a company, a country.
Anyway... Again, I know I cannot force any of these on you. I don't even need to say do as you wish. I just wish that one day I won't be disillusioned with my trust in people doing the right thing."
Think of this... Imagine a situation:
One day, you hear from the administration of your child's school that s/he's been kicked out from school because of several violations. What would you do? Mind you, until that moment, you have never, never ever, not even once, have heard of anything from the school. I suppose any parent would naturally ask “What did s/he do?” That's what I asked Ric after I heard the announcement in my podcast that I was kicked out from school, sorry EPS. So this was even worse, imagine you heard it blasted from the city radio that your child was kicked out from school for several violations. Anyway, so you ask the most natural question, wanting to know: “What did s/he do?” The management, who blasted this news, tells you “Well, there were many complaints about your child.”
???? And?... What were those? I suppose you'd naturally want to know what your child did.
The management says “Oh, I don't know. But many people complained.”
Now... This would never ever happen to you. You would never ever send your child to such a shitty school. If your child does anything, if there is any complaint from any other classmate or parent of a classmate, you'd naturally expect the administration to inform you about it. Give you a chance to evaluate and discuss the issue. No. You are not given any such opportunity, you are just considered a shitbag, and your name is slandered. Oh great!
So, if by any chance you have enrolled your child to such a school, you'd be glad s/he was out anyway and would not want your child to attend such a shitty school anyway. Ah, if you say anything against the administration, question their competence, ah they label you “an irrational player.”
Perfect civility. From the citizens of the greatest country in the world!
I am sick and tired of people accusing me when I react to their mistakes and my reaction is totally valid!
Taking responsibility and saying sorry when you make a mistake. I am obsessed with this. My recent favorite is a Seneca quote:
Yes, 'To err is human, but to persist in the mistake is diabolical.”
And so many people insist on their mistakes. That's one thing that makes the world a horrible place and escalates problems that could just dissipate easily if the one in the wrong was courageous enough to accept his mistake.
If only Ric had just acknowledged and apologized, there would have been one less person who felt mistreated.
I know, or rather I learnt that there are so many, in fact too many people who do not know how to apologize but come on... If you are making a podcast, if you are doing public media, there are some manners to go about, to follow when you make a mistake.
“Correcting or Retracting Your Work After Publication” published on August 21, 2019 by Digital Media Law states:
“Responding to a retraction request will vary with the nature of your statements and the details of your state's retraction statute or case law. Generally speaking, to be effective, a retraction must be a "frank and full" withdrawal of the defamatory accusation. Merely stating that the subject of the statement denies the accusation is not enough, nor is a weak, grudging, or half-hearted correction. Additionally, the retraction must appear in a manner comparable to that of the original publication and be disseminated to the same audience.”
Yes! Exactly! Ric should retract his words, not just change them on his website so people do not even understand my reaction. Plus, you don't just delete the podcast and unburden yourself of responsibility. The wrong information you broadcasted and the correction needs to be disseminated to the same audience in the same way!
Ric still needs to broadcast the retraction on his podcast.
This is the New York Times. On the article “Make No Mistake, but if You Do, Here’s How to Correct It” by Margaret Sullivan published on January 16, 2013 it says how they do NOT change articles when they realize they have made a mistake, they add a correction. If they ever do change it, they “without exception, acknowledge and explain at the bottom that 'an earlier version of this article'.... screwed up whatever. (Let us count the ways.)”
So Ric had to count the ways he screwed up saying I was kicked out for several violations. He still has that responsibility and obligation.
“Greg Brock retired from The Times; he was not fired.” Any person so maligned would want The Times to point every reader to that correction – in huge type.
Yes, I was maligned and I want that correction in HUGE TYPE. And I want it disseminated to the same audience!
Call to Ric's Patrons
What do I need to do to have Ric apologize to me in public? What is the practical solution and the pragmatic approach? What is the better way to accomplish my objective?
To me, the only way is to pressure his patrons. He knows he is wrong too. But he will never acknowledge it on his own. If he was decent, he'd have done it long time ago, on his own in the first place.
So this is a request from you to face Ric about his public slandering, to make pressure on him to make a public apology and to STOP supporting his Counting Countries podcast as his patron if he does not. For you to Please stop supporting Ric until he apologizes Publicly!
PS: Do I really think that any of Ric's patrons will actually read, care and stop supporting Ric? Not really. Even Ryan, who is someone who understands me, who has said I was a thought-leader in his life, who wanted to get me back in EPS, who is now also a moderator in the group did not care enough to do that. Or rather, he didn't want to compromise his interests. For I believe he has some intentions to grow his audience and do something in the travel industry as well.
Oh well... That's life. That's how the world works. On interests, on where your loyalties lie.
But then why... If I don't think that any of Ric's patrons will care about my call, if I don't think that Ric will ever apologize to me even in private let alone publicly... then why do I still take pains to write all this stuff??
Well... That's a good question. A question that even I am not able to answer. Perhaps it is a way of procrastination not to work on my books which are so important for me, or perhaps it is a way to work out my problems with people and to understand myself better. Perhaps it is to idly amuse myself to pass the time, or perhaps it is psychotherapy to get over my grievances. Or yet another perhaps, it is much more than that, it is an attempt at conveying a greater message to people. Or it is simply a push I have.
Whatever it is... I wrote it. What you want to do with it is none of my business. That is left to you.
My EPS Adventure- Behind the Scenes
Asked to Come Back
Threats and Controversy
A Podcast Gone Wrong
Tantrums and Rants